Seems like everyone in tech is bicoastal now, but I started the trend in 2019. When I first moved to New York from SF, I used to frantically google “sf vs. nyc” and share funny memes with friends who also loved to talk about moving to New York. Anyway, one day I just did it, and I’m very glad I did, even though I’ve now moved back and forth enough times that I’ve lost count.
People often ask me which city I prefer, and I immediately write them off as someone who “doesn’t get it” (if you are one of those people, sorry, it’s the truth) because there is no clear winner here. Both cities are amazing. But I get what they’re asking, so fine, here’s a comparison.
Obviously, if you’re single, New York wins in dating. I know a nontrivial number of people who’ve been catfished on Hinge by someone who said they live in New York but who secretly lives in SF. San Franciscans want the New York dating scene! I have also been guilty of this shittery, and I’d say I’m sorry, but I’m not sorry at all. Dating in New York is objectively better.
I learned this when, on a second date, a guy casually took me flying on a plane to appreciate the Manhattan skyline. True story, photos attached. Yes he was flying the plane and yes, he had a day job in finance. I remember sitting on this plane thinking huh, here I’ve been accepting coffee dates in SF. Here is a great TikTok about this dichotomy.
Related to dating, New Yorkers are better across lifestyle. They dress much better, restaurants are more interesting and better decorated, music is better. New York has all the seasons so that keeps things interesting too. On any given day, you can step outside and have yourself a sensory adventure. It’s a lot more fun.
And on the other hand, obviously, San Francisco’s much better for building in tech, or even to be inspired by tech in general. The flying-on-second-date guy worked in finance but had never heard of Stripe! I mean… smh.
A few cities have tried to replace SF as tech hub — Silicon Alley in New York, Miami had it’s moment during the pandemic — but like, who are we kidding. Now with the AI revolution firmly rooted in SF, this debate has finally died down.
Relatedly, San Francisco’s got a lot of support that helps the ecosystem to focus and build: group houses where founders live and build together, co-working spots that double as social clubs, very consistent weather so no one has to think about what they are wearing (though I am finding that people want to dress more like New Yorkers!).
Tech is everywhere in SF. It’s amazing to go to a cafe and eavesdrop the next conversation about a founder “not pitching” to VCs or designers sharing their latest mock. If you’re in tech and want to focus, nothing beats being in San Francisco.
I feel different in the two cities. In New York, especially in summertime, I’m free and creative and flowing with ideas like life is an unending adventure, but it’s harder for me to focus — because I always just want to go for a walk. I experiment with my outfits and try interesting new restaurants and never know how my day will end up, in the best of ways. This song perfectly encapsulates the magic that is summer in New York.
In San Francisco, I’m wholesome and grounded and consistent, much like the weather. I can go to any cafe or co-working spot and run into people I know because the founder community here is so tight-knit. I come back here to execute on the ideas I had in New York.
Infrastructure-wise, New York wins hands down. The public transport is great and as a woman, I feel much safer in New York. I can walk around pretty much anywhere and count on NYPD. In SF almost all the women I know carry tasers around and spend too much money on ubers. Regardless of who you are, many parts of SF just aren’t safe. It’s incredibly unfortunate and difficult to justify especially given the high taxes we pay in California.
Lastly, the SF <> NYC balance is quite seasonal; in summertime it tips towards New York and vice versa in the winter.
Both cities are incredible and my advice to anyone asking is: if you haven’t lived in one, and you’re considering it, you must at least try it out :)